Ideas for alone time with the spouse...get your mind out of the gutter.

Ok...here lately, I have been neglecting myself, and my hubby for my role in Mommy-hood. Let me explain...Since becoming a mother, I have devoted ALOT of time to being Mommy. In fact, I can't remember what it is like to NOT be a mom. I have sort of lost myself to my kids. Don't get me wrong...I love my kids, and there isn't anything in the world that would make me ever regret the time I've had with them, but I have sort of lost myself and neglected time with the hubby for them.  Every evening after they go to bed, I just want to veg out and watch TV. Yes to some, that is a waste of time, but to me it is MY time to unwind, and not have to hear "can I have...,?" or "will you...? or "MOM.....he took my...", you get the idea. Well, until recently, I have failed to notice that none of my day included my hubby. Yes, very sad, but true. AND because he is so nice, he never complained. He's dropped subtle hints, but I would just shrug them off and go on about MY time. Well I realized that, I am not being fair to him by doing this. So I have been doing some thinking and digging online today, and found some cool things that we can do that just makes sense. So I have decide to share these with you, and hopefully those of you who may be in the same "funk" as me can get some use out of them. Most of these are done at home after the kids are asleep. (Don't go there, this is rated PG, so keep your mind out of the gutter.) Also, If there are any you'd like to share with me, that would be great, but please keep it clean, I'm not looking for that kind of advice. Thanks! So here they are...ENJOY!

1. Write “I LOVE YOU” backwards and tape it where it can be read in the mirror so it the first thing he sees in the mirror.



2. After the kids are in bed for the night, turn on some music, and dance.


3. After the kids are in bed, have a starlit, outdoor picnic of you favorite snack foods.


4. Cuddle while looking at wedding pictures and reminiscing about your wedding/honeymoon.


5. Put love notes in your spouse’s pocket/lunch when they are not looking.


6. Cuddle with each other under the stars.


7. Hide notes around the house (where you know they will find them) telling them how much you appreciate them.


8. Take a walk together.

9. Create a clue game for your spouse to play, with clues leading to prizes expressing your love for them (bonus being the prize at the end...YOU.)

10. After the kids are asleep, have an indoor picnic with dim lights and soft music.



11. Talk about the first time you met.


12. Talk about favorite memories.


13. Do Bible devotionals.




Yes these seem like no "no-brainers", but I liked them, and will be trying them. I love my husband very much and sometimes I take him for granted, he is God's gift to me, and I want to cherish him. I really want to improve so, I am going to break the Mommy role, and devote some time for him. I hope you all will do the same.

In the middle of my little mess...I forget how big I'm blessed.

There are many days that I feel overwhelmed, and every little thing that can go wrong...does. Well, I have found a song that speaks wonders when the little things in life go wrong. The song is "This Is The Stuff" by Francesca Batistelli. In case you weren't at church, I sang this song today as a special and it fit PJ's sermon very well (it is always an added bonus when God plans it that way.) Here are the lyrics:

This Is The Stuff :



I lost my keys in the great unknown
And call me please 'Cuz I can't find my phone


This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use


45 in a 35
Sirens and fines while I'm running behind
Whoa


This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff that's getting to me lately
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use


So break me of impatience
Conquer my frustrations
I've got a new appreciation
It's not the end of the world


Oh Oh Oh


This is the stuff that drives me crazy
This is the stuff
Someone save me
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed
This is the stuff that gets under my skin
And I've gotta trust You know exactly what You're doing
It might not be what I would choose
But this is the stuff You use
Oh Oh Oh Oh


This is the stuff You use

Everyone has days like these, but just remember how big you're blessed!

7 years and still feels like yesterday

Seven years ago today, someone special to me, went to live with Jesus. She was not only my mother-in-law, but a very special lady. She was very strong, a devoted Christian, my mentor, and the reason I am a part of her wonderful family. Our relationship was not the typical "in-law" relationship. Ours was special. She and my Father-in-law took me in at a time when I had no idea of where my life was going. She helped me make the most important decisions of my life, and saw me through a really bad time in my life. I know God chose her to be my mother-in-law, and I thank him everyday for that. There are so many times in life that I have thought" If I only had one more day with her, there would be so many things I'd ask her." First of all, I'd thank her for the wonderful job she did in raising her children, and I'd ask her to give me all her secrets. She raised two wonderful guys. One of them being the father of my children and the love of my life. The other being the best brother-in-law a girl could have. I can only hope that I am doing as good a job as a mother as she did. Secondly, I'd ask her for wisdom on how to become such a strong person. She was the strongest person I know. I loved her just like my own Mom. So, on this day, the seventh anniversary of her passing, I say Thank you, God for the gift of knowing her. Thank you also, for the privilege of being apart of her family. Thank you for the best husband and family-in-law a person could have. AND to "B", herself...I will always love and miss you, thank you for being you!

My last baby is getting big.

Annie is 8 months old today. Man, where does the time go? It makes me sad to think my last baby is getting big. It is the end of the tiny new born stage. No more tiny baby stuff for us (well, that is our plan at least, we are complete...no more babies here). We are selling her infant swing, which makes me sad.  Annie has been the most content of all my children. She is a very happy, laid back little girl. Don't get me wrong, she makes it a point to be heard when she needs something, but most of the time she just sits and plays. She loves to babble and squeal. She is starting to put words with objects. When she wants me she will say "mum mum". It melts my heart everytime she does it. She even has "da da" down. One day when M was at work I said "where's da da?", she looked over at his guitar and tilted her head as if she were looking for him and looked back at me and said "da". It is moments like these that I never want to forget. Her favorite thing to do is eat (just like her "mum mum"). She loves to feed herself crackers and cereal she even says "ma" when she wants more. I haven't found anything she doesn't like except baby food green beans, but who likes those anyway? Also, she is a very good sleeper. She goes down so easy. When it is time for nap, I'll take her to her crib or pack n play, lay her down and that's it. It makes me sad to see her growing so fast, but I am looking forward to the next phase too.

The story of ME

Here in St. Louis a common question among the population is "What high school did you go to?" I'm not sure why this, of all questions to ask, is the biggest, but it is. I have lived here almost twelve years now, and I can't tell you how many times I've been asked that question. WHY? I don't get it, but anyway... The conversation usually comes to a screeching halt when I answer Holdenville High School. I get some of the funniest looks and then I follow up with "you have never heard of it...it is a small rural town in southern Oklahoma."  Then there it is, the "ah ha" expression on their face that usually leaves me grinning inside. After that takes place one of two things happen. A) They either nod their head and the conversation is done or B) they continue with further questions about Oklahoma (although, I have had a couple of instances where they actually knew where I was talking about, and that just creeped me out.) Anyway...If B happens I usually give them a brief "in a nut shell" version of my story. BUT for those of you who don't know and are curious...here is the longer version of ME.
I spent most of my childhood in a small southern Oklahoma town called Holdenville...population 4,732 (according to the 2000 census). Holdenville is one of those town where everyone know everyone else, and when someone is in trouble the whole town talks about it. Everywhere you go, someone waves a "Oklahoma howdy." It really makes one feel welcome. Some of the features of Holdenville include a WalMart with a McDonalds (yes that is a big thing to those of us who live(d) there), a Sonic drive in, and if memory serves me right, there used to be a Subway located inside of a Citgo gas station. BUT in this little town it really isn't all about the retail chains it is about all the Mom and Pop stores. I must give a shout out to David's mini market, which was the hang out spot at lunch time for high school students...they have the best cheese balls and burritos with garlic dressing. YUM! Ok....back to the subject. Holdenville is a big part of me. It is what made me who I am today. Growing up it was just my mom and I living in a small house in Holdenville. She worked as a waitress at one of the local restaurants. We never had much money, but managed to survive on what little we had. I went through grade school, middle school, and high school in the same town and my graduating class was roughly 72 people. I wasn't in the most popular clique in school, but I was ok with that because the friends I had were genuine friends, most of which I still speak with today. I wasn't really the partier and those parties I did go to I mostly just sat and laughed at others "enjoying" themselves a little too much. I wasn't much of a trouble maker, and just enjoyed Friday nights dragging main street with my girls and looping through Sonic repetitively. We did this for hours in my beat up 1989 Ford Tempo. Every once in a while, we'd get bored with looping through Sonic and go on down to WalMart to turn around and make the loop again. It was not super exciting, but we had fun doing it. I was very involved in my highschool honor choir. We were called Limited Edition, and we did very well in competitions. I was not athletic or a cheerleader or even a band geek, I was simply a singer, and still am today. Growing up, I was very involved in church (I still am today). I attended a small church called First Church of God. I sang on the praise team, was a part of the youth and eventually met my husband to be there, but I will save that story for another blog. Believe me, it is a good one so you may want to read it after I post it.  Even though I do not live in my comfy hometown of Holdenville Oklahoma, I still love to visit. It brings back so many memories. I do miss the quiet small town, but am really enjoying the suburban life. There is sooo much more I could put, but this is a blog not a book. As with any family situation, there were happy times, and there were sad times, but all in all everything we go through in life makes us who we are. I am just fortunate to have turned out the way I am. I wouldn't change the story of ME for anything. I have learned so much in my thirt...(cough cough) thirty years on this earth. I thank God for getting me this far in life, and I am excited to see what the future holds. He has blessed me with three wonderful children and an excellent husband. I couldn't of had these things without God and the life's experiences I've been through. So now you know the story of ME! What you see is what you get!

Playing the "Jesus" card.

My kids never cease to amaze me(especially my middle child). I know it is normal to have those days when you are ready to pull your hair out because the children are at each throats. Or those days when not matter where you are in the house, you can still hear them screaming at each other. Or, my all time favorite, when they follow you from room to room arguing and hitting one another just to see how you will respond. Yeah...you know what I'm talking about. Well the flip side to all of those crazy times is worth waiting for. I know I am doing right when my kids play the "Jesus" card. Amelia is notorious for this. I shared a story a few posts back about the people who crucified Jesus being on the naughty list, well she has come up with yet another one. This weekend Amelia was talking to M about a birthday party she had been invited to. She wanted to take a toy to the party and asked her daddy if it was OK. He told her that it would be a good idea to leave the toy home because there would be alot of fun things to at the party(I'm paraphrasing a little). She then responded saying "but, I want to take it so I can share it. Isn't that what Jesus wants me to do? Share?" Cracked me up when I heard this. She often plays the "Jesus" card when she wants to do something because she thinks that if she "name drops" it will get her what she wants. Needless to say, we laughed, but NO she didn't get to take the toy. It is times like these that make up for the not so fun times.

Christm...I mean, Kwanzaa???

Today my kids made my heart smile (as they often do). I was in the bedroom listening to them as they played nicely together (without arguing...which very rarely happens) so needless to say, I was enjoying what I heard. They were playing "church". Caleb was Pastor J, and Amelia was herself. Caleb says "Ok, kids, come on up, it's time for the children's message." Amelia sits down in front of him and Caleb says " Ok...are you all excited for Christm....wait, I mean,  are you all excited for Kwanzaa?" At this point, I was hysterically laughing while trying to listen to where he was going with his children's message. He continues in saying "yes it is Kwanzaa, and when you go downstairs you will learn more...let us pray. Dear Jesus, Thank you for the day, thank you for the food, and thank you for church today. It's Chrismas and Kwanzaa.  Amen." We, obviously, celebrate Christ's birthday in our house, but somewhere along the way, he has picked up celebrating Kwanzaa. So to all of you, we wish you a Merry CHRISTmas, and a Happy Kwanzaa!